Here are a few useful tips, tools and strategies, including affirmations and anchors, which may help you, not just at Christmas but throughout the year. Even if you just pick one, it’s a Step Forward.
1. Stop Trying to Be Perfect
There is NO ‘perfect’! Are you someone who keeps going back to something to make the smallest of changes? Do you walk past the tree and feel the urge to rearrange a bauble or the position of a present? Perfect is an illusion, something we can never achieve but can drive ourselves and others mad in the process! I’m constantly working on retraining myself to accept ‘good enough’ and it is such a relief. Not only can I enjoy the decorations rather than casting a critical eye but it works in all areas of my life. I can post on Facebook, publish blogs, send out a newsletter – I would like to say with ease and without having that jitty feeling when pressing the ‘Send’ or ‘Publish’ button, but I’m moving nearer to accepting that there may be grammatical or spilling errors.
If you don’t believe in these, just give it a go, I did and they really do work! The key is repetition. Make a positive statement; write it down for greater effect. Use your own words but here are some examples
‘I AM enjoying this precious time with my family’
‘I give myself permission to relax’
‘It IS good enough’.
3. Self Care
Do you find yourself slumped in the chair totally exhausted by 7pm on Christmas Day, thinking ‘is it bedtime yet?’, ‘yipee – another year over’? Not one of our friends or family is worth this feeling. But it’s you who are responsible for looking after yourself.
Check in with yourself now, I mean NOW!, you are probably shallow breathing. Take some real deep belly breaths, breathe in pushing your stomach out, hold for 4 seconds then breathe out for 7 seconds. Can you feel your shoulders dropping? Feels good doesn’t it? When you get that relaxed, calm feeling squeeze you thumb and forefinger together for 5 seconds, setting an anchor point. Do this several times and when you encounter a stressful time and could do with some calmness use your anchor (squeeze your thumb and forefinger together) and release that feeling.
Start doing this now and by Christmas you’ll be a personification of calmness!
4. Do something different
What can you do differently? Why keep doing something that you don’t enjoy? The betting is that the others don’t enjoy it either. I remember my Dad at the age of 80 telling us that he didn’t like turkey but hadn’t like to say anything! Talk before the big day and ask for everyone’s input – it might be that you don’t even spend it together?
If you do it the same as last year it will probably end up the same.
5. They Can’t Mind Read!
Do you stomp around the house seething inside whilst they lounge in front of the TV? Do you mutter under your breath ‘don’t you move I’ll do it all!’ All they know is that you are in a bad mood, so they’ll try and keep out of your way. Don’t expect people to mind read, subtlety doesn’t work. Be open and ask for help, if possible before you need it rather than when you have worked yourself up to boiling point.
If you want to make sure that next year is even better than this year, why not get in touch? and have a chat or a FREE mini coaching call. I can help you to manage the stressful situations and events in your life in a much calmer and productive way.
Wishing you a peaceful and relaxed holiday.XXX
Don’t forget to check out the Christmas offer which expires on the 15th December 2016 – Save £55 on ALL 2017 workshop or come along and find out more at our Self Development Group meeting 7-9pm Monday 9th January